When Courtney was pregnant, her doctor told her that her baby would have Down syndrome and strongly suggested that she terminate the pregnancy.
Two years after giving birth to Emersyn, Courtney wrote a letter to that doctor. This is what she said:
*”A friend recently shared her experience with her prenatal specialist. During her sonograms, the doctor would comment, ‘He’s perfect.’ When her son was born with Down syndrome, she visited the doctor again. He looked at her little boy and said, ‘I told you. He’s perfect.’
Her story tore me apart. While I was grateful for my friend’s experience, it filled me with sorrow for what I should have had. I wish you had been that doctor for me. I came to you during one of the most difficult times of my life—terrified, anxious, and in complete despair. I didn’t yet know the truth about my baby, and that’s what I desperately needed from you.
Instead of support and encouragement, you suggested terminating our child. I told you her name, and you asked again if we understood how our quality of life would be affected by having a child with Down syndrome. You suggested we reconsider continuing the pregnancy.
From that first visit, we dreaded every appointment. The hardest period of my life was made nearly unbearable because you never told me the truth: my child was perfect.
I am not angry. I am not bitter. I am simply sad. Sad that the tiny, beating hearts you see every day don’t always fill you with awe. Sad that the intricate miracle of fingers, toes, lungs, eyes, and ears doesn’t always make you pause. Sad that you were so wrong to suggest a baby with Down syndrome would diminish our lives. Most of all, I am heartbroken that you might still say that to another mother today.
But I am mostly sad that you will never have the privilege of knowing my daughter, Emersyn.
Emersyn has not only enriched our lives—she has touched thousands of hearts. She has given us joy, purpose, laughter, and love beyond words. She has opened our eyes to true beauty and pure love.
So my prayer is that no other mother will endure what I did. My prayer is that you, too, will see true beauty and pure love in every sonogram. And my prayer is that when you see the next baby with Down syndrome nestled in her mother’s womb, you will look at that mother and tell her the truth: ‘Your child is absolutely perfect.’”*
Every child is perfect 💞
Photo Credit – Courtney Williams Baker