Meri Abused the Brown Family.
That needs to be said and repeated, because far too many people bend over backward to defend Meri’s inexcusable behavior. Some will even vilify Gwen, Mykelti, Paedon, Janelle, and Christine just to make Meri seem less reprehensible. And if that doesn’t work, they’ll go after other fans. This should not happen.
Meri is an abuser.
Liking Meri doesn’t change that. Neither does the fact that:
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She was emotionally abused by Kody.
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She came from a cult background.
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Janelle had a prior marriage before joining the family.
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Gwen and Ysabel have since had decent relationships with her.
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One of the victims worked for her or some of them spent time at her house.
None of those things erase Meri’s abusive treatment of her family.
People often love their abusers. It’s a painful truth. Abuse isn’t constant cruelty, it’s unpredictable, confusing, and often wrapped in moments of kindness or connection. That’s what makes it so hard to identify and even harder to escape.
Christine once said she never knew which Meri she would get: the friend she could laugh with or the woman who terrorized her and her children. That’s the reality of abuse.
Being K’s legal wife gave Meri power, and that made everything worse. Leaving an abuser is hard. Leaving when it also means losing your co-wife, your spiritual community, and your children's father? That’s almost impossible.
People often point to the kids spending time at Meri’s Lehi home as proof she wasn’t abusive. But when the family moved to Vegas and the kids had more freedom, they didn’t go to her house anymore, even though Meri tried to make it appealing. That change shows the truth: their earlier visits weren’t because they felt safe and loved, but because they were stuck in a trauma response. They were fawning, or trying to appease someone who had hurt them.
The fact that Janelle financially supported Meri (she only had a part-time job that she would skip out on to get more time with K) while being made to feel like she either needed to be away from home or in her room is also very telling. Many abuse victims will describe their ways of avoiding abuse this way in leaving early, staying out late, and keeping to certain parts of the house. Yet, Janelle is often painted as the bad person when she was enduring bad treatment while paying for Meri’s, housing, food, clothing, and fine tastes.
Some will claim that Meri has changed. Yet, any time she's called out for wrongdoings, she cries and plays the victim. If she really changed, she would own what she did.
And look at what’s happened since the family split apart. Most of the adult kids no longer have much to do with Meri, just like they’ve distanced themselves from Robyn and Kody. But they consistently show up for Janelle and Christine. That tells you everything. The ones who were there for them, protected them, and loved them are still in their lives. The ones who caused harm? They’re not.
Meri was an abuser.
And the fact that some of her victims still tried to love her doesn’t make that any less true.