I’m currently in recovery at a methadone clinic. I’ve been sober since March from fentanyl, crack, Xanax, honestly, from anything I could get my hands on. My boyfriend and I had been together for seven years as of December 31. Tragically, he passed away on November 28 after a single relapse. He had been clean since April.
We made the decision to get sober together after finding out I was pregnant on my 21st birthday. Our son was just over a month old when his father died. He’s almost three months now.
I’m writing this because I have no one I can really talk to about my addiction or our past, and it’s been eating away at me. My boyfriend was my entire world. We met when I was 14 and he was 16; we were inseparable, two halves of one whole.
Staying sober has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I don’t even know how I’m supposed to explain all of this to my son one day. His father was an incredible dad who loved him more than anything.
I know I have to stay sober for my son, especially with CPS involved, but this is by far the most painful experience of my life. This photo is the only one we ever took together with our baby.
I’m sorry for the long post. I just needed to get this out because I don’t have anyone who truly understands what I’m going through.
Credit: Isabella Oliveira (respect 🫡)
