I showed up to work today completely drained, like most mornings. My alarm goes off at 4:30 a.m. and lately I’ve been fighting off an upper respiratory illness that at first felt like a covid scare. The truth is, I’ve been running on empty.
And when you’re tired, patience runs thin. That was me today.
At 10:34 a.m. a familiar face walked up. One of our frequent flyers. And instantly, my frustration kicked in. He knows we don’t admit after 10:30. As soon as I saw him, I was already shaking my head. My only thought was, not today… I don’t have it in me today.
He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could finish his first sentence, I cut him off. I looked him straight in the eyes and said only two words: “10:30.” Then I turned and walked away.
He shouted after me: “You’re only doing this for a paycheck. You don’t care what happens to me.”
And still, I kept walking.
I didn’t admit him. I didn’t even stop to listen. I carried on with my day. But tonight, he’s still on my mind. Heavy on my heart. Because the truth is, he deserved better from me.
This man showed up today after a six day bender because he needed help. And I refused to hear him out. I didn’t act like a good nurse. And worse, I didn’t act like a good human being.
Today, I failed.
Not because I didn’t bend policy, but because I forgot the person in front of me is more than the worst choices he’s ever made. He is a person who deserves dignity, compassion, and a chance.
And it hit me. I need to do better. But it’s not just me. We all need to do better.
We as nurses.
We as parents.
We as friends.
We as a community.
We as a nation.
Addiction is not rare. We all have something in our lives we lean on, even when it isn’t good for us. So why do we judge so quickly when someone else struggles? Why do we offer “tough love” instead of simply love?
This epidemic will not be won with anger or judgment. It will only be won with compassion and empathy.
So to my patient who left feeling unheard today: I am sorry.
Not because I didn’t break the rules, but because I didn’t stop to listen. Because I made you feel like you weren’t worthy of help. Because I wasn’t the nurse you deserved.
You are worthy.
You are loved.
You deserve joy and healing.
I promise, I will do better. And I hope tomorrow, I’ll see you before 10:30 a.m. ♥️
Credit to Betsy Hendrickson – Minton 😍❣️😍❣️😍